You were wired for connection—more specifically: authentic connection. You are meant to love and be loved. To give compassion, comfort, and acceptance, and to receive all of it as well. But with that connection, can come attachment and vulnerability. Two things that for many of us stir up fear.
We’re afraid to connect in genuine ways for that means showing up as we are and maybe forming a bond that we’re afraid to lose or see end.
Being vulnerable and honest and raw is scary enough on its own, but allowing ourselves to form an attachment that has the capacity to include a goodbye might convince us to isolate for the sake of emotional preservation.
But again, you were wired for this. We all are. We can’t guarantee that it won’t hurt at some point, that you won’t feel your heart break from the grief of it all. But you are capable of feeling hard emotions and surviving them. You are also capable of being part of a connection that feels so wonderful and healing that it’s worth the trying moments, too.
Maybe protecting yourself doesn’t have to be centered in solitude. Maybe it can be inviting others in for a moment of authenticity, followed by another and another.
“We’re all just walking each other home.” – Ram Dass
People need other people. You are not weak for wanting or needing support. If you’re seeking professional help, we encourage you to use TWLOHA’s FIND HELP Tool. If you reside outside of the US, please browse our growing International Resources database. You can also text TWLOHA to 741741 to be connected for free, 24/7 to a trained Crisis Text Line counselor. If it’s encouragement or a listening ear that you need, email our team at [email protected].