We were in the car when we got the news. It was my Dad, my sister Emily and me, and we were on our way to see “A Most Wanted Man,” a film starring Phillip Seymour Hoffman, the first of his work to be released after his death.
The news was that Robin Williams had died, his death apparently a suicide.
i knew i wanted to write something that night, but i didn’t want to write about the life or death of Robin Williams. i wanted to write something to people who could perhaps relate to the pain that Mr. Williams knew. i wanted to ask them to stay.
i wrote the words below and gave it the title “There is Still Some Time.” We posted it as a blog and that blog went on to become the most-read in TWLOHA history. We made it available as a poster and a shirt, and when it came time for me to choose a title for my book, i chose the phrase i started with: If You Feel Too Much.
The book debuted on the New York Times Best Seller list, with the Times calling it: “A testament to suicide prevention.” That description meant a lot to me, in light of where the title came from. The hope was that something good could come from something terrible, that someone might feel less alone, that someone might get help or even choose to stay alive.
On the book tour, i shared five or six stories every night. What i chose to read each night was different, depending on the mood and where we were. But as much as i mixed it up, one thing stayed the same. Every reading ended with “There is Still Some Time.”
It’s the heart of the matter. It’s the one thing i want to say. That was true a year ago and it still feels true today.
i hope these words encourage you. Feel free to share them with someone you care about.
Peace to You.
Jamie
*****
If you feel too much, there’s still a place for you here.
If you feel too much, don’t go.
If this world is too painful, stop and rest.
It’s okay to stop and rest.
If you need a break, it’s okay to say you need a break.
This life – it’s not a contest, not a race, not a performance, not a thing that you win.
It’s okay to slow down.
You are here for more than grades, more than a job, more than a promotion, more than keeping up, more than getting by.
This life is not about status or opinion or appearance.
You don’t have to fake it.
You do not have to fake it.
Other people feel this way too.
If your heart is broken, it’s okay to say your heart is broken.
If you feel stuck, it’s okay to say you feel stuck.
If you can’t let go, it’s okay to say you can’t let go.
You are not alone in these places.
Other people feel how you feel.
You are more than just your pain. You are more than wounds, more than drugs, more than death and silence.
There is still some time to be surprised.
There is still some time to ask for help.
There is still some time to start again.
There is still some time for love to find you.
It’s not too late.
You’re not alone.
It’s okay – whatever you need and however long it takes – it’s okay.
It’s okay.
If you feel too much, there’s still a place for you here.
If you feel too much, don’t go.
There is still some time.
Lei Lani Lucero
thank you.
April Strong
Thank you. <3
Heidi
Hello, i just showed a group of young men the movie to write love on her arms. I am there group leader in a 24 hour residential treatment facility thet live in. They are dealing with pain, and have ___, used drugs and tried to commit suicide. 8 am trying to diligently show 5hem, they have time. If ypu have time to write them thet wpuld love it. There are 12 boys aged 13 to 17. The movie was easy for two to see and triggered most. It was a good thing they said to watch and they like Renee’s story, but are still struggling with there own stories. I will be ordering bracelets and t-shirts gor them to wear to know thet have hope. Thank ypu for your outreach in Emmett Id. Heidi hidy
Claire Biggs
Hi Heidi,
We’d love to send them something. Would you please email [email protected] with more information?
Ashley Lallman
Needed this today. A lot going on in my life recently and this helps.
Diana
Wish I could have told my brother this…
Instead I asked him to wait for me…
Jenn
Beautiful . Just what I needed to hear today . It’s always hard , life. Thanks for the reminder …
Tressi Pierce
I love this article. Suffering from depression is not an easy task. Especially in a world where not everyone understands. I listen to music almost all day, every day. I find it to be very helpful, when I can’t express how I’m feeling or know what to say, I turn on my music and they say it for me. Sometimes even instrumentals are the way to go, bc if words can’t describe the pain…the guitar, drums or the piano with it’s notes, twists and turns through the speakers know and understand what I feel.
I have found a lot of the songs by Switchfoot on their album “The Beautiful Letdown” are extremely helpful. “Date You to Move” is an amazing song, full of inspiration, there’s also a song, not sure of the title, that says, “I don’t belong here, I will carry a cross and a song, where I don’t belong.”
Laura
Reading this felt like I was being spoken to. Being given permission to be who I am, where I am at and not to have to compare myself to anyone else or to reach/attain the same thing as others. That it is okay to not have the “landmark” type, often age-related status things in life eg. I’m 40 in a year and a half and I don’t meet the “got a career, children, mortgage, holidays, car etc” but I DO have things whether they be tangible or not. To know there is still some time is good. For a lot of this year I haven’t felt that way. Is it really the case that I’m not too old at almost 40 to be thinking it’s all worth working on? Healing? I lack self-confidence and have a really low self-esteem and look for reassurance a lot. Your writing really meant a lot to me. I live in North West England, do you visit here? Could I email you guys?
Claire Biggs
Hi Laura,
We’d love to hear from you! You can reach us at [email protected].
Emma
I don’t usually comment, but I wanted to say thank you. This past year has been so difficult, and I can’t tell you how many times I have come back to read this, to find hope and to feel allowed and to sit with the kindness in the words. Thank you so much for writing this. These words have helped in so many ways.
Charlotte
Just want to say thank you from Sweden. Right now these words are to overwhelming for me and I can’t take them to heart. But maybe one day I can.
Thank you <3
normand jones
I am sorry i do not have an e-mail adress , but i felt compelled to write and thank you . You see i just finished watching the movie and it touched my heart , n my inner being . That inner being is something i thought a long time ago . You see i have been addicted to one drug or another for 48 years , but i have never been able to admit it to myself . Thanks to the movie , i belive that there is still hope for an old bugger like me . So thank you young lady for your story and i am going to fight the good fight and get the help that i need . Much love to you and know that you have made a difference . : – ]
Bellz
You do not have to fake it.
You do not have to fake it.
I can’t tell you how important these words are to me. I’m deep in depression now, being really hard on myself, crying, so sad when I let myself feel it, but maintaining ok when I try not to. The sadness has been creeping into my inner world, and I’ve been resentful of everyone else who feels love and belonging. The advise I’ve been getting is to fake it till I make it. That if I fake it long enough, I’ll start to believe it. That’s not me.
I didn’t know anything about this story until yesterday, when I googled, what do I do when I feel too much? (looking for a forum). And I found your story, watched the movie, and have found this blog.
It’s really really hard to be in depression, to be the dark cloud in the room, the saddest one, the one who crumbles when a friend asks how I’m doing. From the outside I look like I’ve got a great life.
I wall myself off because I’m so sad, crying, sobbing, for no reason. I don’t want to fake it, so I self isolate. All this exists under the smile, the curiosity, and everything else that is working and wonderful. I feel so very alone in the world, even when I’m with people. I know that this dialogue, and sadness is mine, that it’s all about my inner-mindset. But there’s something in me that is just, broken, and doesn’t ever let myself feel loved and wanted, unless it comes from people more broken than me. It’s messed up.
I really appreciate those words. You don’t have to fake it. I’m glad you said it twice. I finally got into therapy last week, and she said to me, “sometimes you have to fall apart, in order to put yourself back together.” Yep. But this is probably my 5th major depression in a pretty functional, free and empowered life. I don’t want to focus on it, because I know that the bottom will drop out. This one is different. I not suicidal, but I’m deeply hopeless, and I definitely want to run…. away from everyone and everything. It’s hard to feel too much, when everyone else seems to be able to brush things off, feel their ego, and maintain. Sometimes it’s a beautiful gift to be sensitive, but right now, it feels like a curse.
lorna
read every word ….there’s still time, even if I feel too much….
Phoebe Weiss
this writing, all the stories on this blog or page, all this encouragement, is such a beautiful thing. this fills my heart, mind, and soul, with so much love replacing all the sadness in me. i thank you, and everyone who submitts on this blog. you are the reason I am happy. YOU made me happy today, I’m going to forever remember everything I’ve seen on this blog. thank you so much to the beautiful inspiring person who wrote this.
ashley
I seen the movie “to write love on her arms ” for the first time today. The movie really resonated with me , as I have for a long time suffered from depression and as a young teenager had attempted to end my life. After watching the movie I immediately felt the need to check out with organization. I think what you guys are doing is so amazing and inspirational. You are giving light to those who are lost in darkness. You are providing a sense of community when they are feeling truly alone. As a teenager I had very supportive family and friends. However despite their attempts to understand what I was going through..it is hard to expres sadness when you don’t yourself fully understand where the sadness comes from. Being unable to understand or express my feelings to others made me feel alone, despite being surrounded by loved ones. This organzition gives people hope and encouragement by showing them they are not alone. By showing them that they are others who feel the same way and understand their struggles. Thank you so much for taking the time to help, for taking the time to show you care, for taking the time to make people feel important and understood, for taking the time to show them, as you said, that there is still time.
Danika
These are beautiful words. I read it over and over when I got your book. They make me cry every time because I read it when I do feel too much, when I want to go. Thank you, Jamie. Thank you for the words that no one else knew/knows how to say. Thank you, for for telling me there is still more time.
Caitlin
To the author:
I’m in the middle of reading If You Feel Too Much. I came to this website to tell you…a lot. So I looked for your name in the blog posts and I’m so glad that this was the first thing that popped up. I have been through so much in the past year that it is almost too much. I feel like maybe I just got through the worst of it, and I’m hoping that things will look up. And I’m praying for joy and peace. And I just want you to know that what you do is amazing. I appreciate it and you, and I’m positive I’m not the only one. Anyway, I’m not sure why I decided to write all this. I think it’s because I feel like every page I read, I feel like you’re confiding in the reader (aka me). So that ultimately makes me feel like we’re friends. Which is nice, because I don’t have a lot of people who feel they can confide in me. I’m not even sure if you’ll read this but if you do, cool. I hope that maybe somewhere down the line I will get to exchange stories with you face to face.
Thank you,
a very inspired reader