Dreams to Keep Dreaming.

By Jamie Tworkowski • August 2, 2014

My parents lost a baby boy 37 years ago today. Doctors told them to stop trying to have kids. i’m glad they didn’t listen. 

My brother was born and died the same day. My Mom & Dad gave him a name and i suppose they did that to say that he had lived, to say that he mattered and to say they would remember. My brother’s name was Jesse. 

My parents went on to have me, and then three years later my sister Jessica, and six years after that, my sister Emily. Jessica & her husband Sean tried for three years to get pregnant. They eventually decided to do IVF, and posted a blog inviting people to donate to help pay for the expensive procedure. Friends and family and even strangers gave more than $10,000. When my nephew Landon was born, the New York Times called him “the world’s first crowd-funded baby.” Two years later, Jessica got pregnant again, this time a total surprise. i remember finding out and crying because the news seemed impossible. Jess jokes it was “buy one, get one free.” Declan is here and healthy and getting bigger everyday. 

The moral of the story: It seems to me that much of life is figuring out what to hold on to and what to let go of. i know there are some dreams we have to eventually release, but there are also dreams to keep dreaming. Tonight i’m glad my Mom didn’t give up on her dream of having children. And that years later, her courage and strength would inspire her daughter to do the very same thing.

(In other news, i’m told that Landon peed in the toilet today. He mostly missed but hey, you gotta start somewhere)

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Comments (4)

  1. Lorraine Edmiston

    I remember these times vividly.The sadness of the loss of Jesse. Then the unbelievable joy that you had been born healthy!I cried for days!Then your beautiful sisters joined you! I’m glad your parents didn’t listen to the doctors.
    I’m glad Jess & Sean never gave up up hope!
    It’s so inspiring…never give up on your dreams!(If you’re absolutely forced to,get new ones.)
    P.S. Go Landon!!!

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  2. Melody Austin

    Thanks for sharing something so personal and inspiring. My parents were told the same thing after my mother’s 6th miscarriage after my sister was born. To say the least, I’m pretty grateful that my parents are stubborn and tried one more time. Early in my mother’s pregnancy the doctors told her that I would be disfigured and never be able to take care of myself. Did I mention they’re stubborn? Even after being born at a dangerous 30 weeks, they didn’t give up on me in the hospital and now I’m as normal as anyone else who is brave enough to live life to the fullest.

    I’m celebrating my 26th birthday tomorrow, because of the stubbornness of two dreamers. They believed in something bigger than themselves and did everything they could to give me a fighting chance. It’s amazing that Jesse’s story has in some way given many others the same chance as well. Thanks again for sharing 🙂

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  3. Cheryl

    I am one of those don’t give up babies as well. My parents also lost a baby boy 7 months in vitro. 4 years later I was a total surprise and the last child my mother could have. I’m glad I was an oops and survived.

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  4. Iman

    Wow, this was absolutely beautiful Jamie. Thank you so much for sharing. You should tell this story when you go out and speak. 🙂 It’s so heartwarming and moving. It truly is. 🙂

    Reply  |  
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