Wanting Is Reason Enough

By Sammy NickallsJanuary 26, 2015

When I was in sixth grade, one of my biggest accomplishments—in my eyes, anyway—was typing at over 100 words per minute.

I know, I know. What kid is passionate about typing

But I remember glowing that day in keyboarding class, smiling from ear to ear. I could get out so many letters, so many words, so quickly! I was absolutely ecstatic.

You see, a few months prior to that day, I had asked my parents to buy me the Mavis Beacon program we used in keyboarding class. After hearing my request, my mother had given me a somewhat strange look, but she complied. Soon, I was practicing every day after school, shooting down aliens by typing words in their general direction (the logic of Mavis Beacon is not to be questioned).

I constantly worked to hone my typing skills each and every day of that school year. I was like an aspiring Olympian – if there was ever an Olympics for typists. 

At the time, if someone had asked me why I loved to type so much, I would have had absolutely no idea. Not even a clue. 

I just knew how satisfying it felt to be able to get those words on a page as fast as I possibly could. With a pencil, my hand got in the way of my thoughts. I couldn’t get it all down quickly enough, and I was terrified of missing a single thought. But by learning to type so quickly, I could get my thoughts down almost immediately—before I lost them in their purest form, like smoke disappearing through my fingers. 

At the time, I was planning on going into neuroscience. And if I hadn’t taken keyboarding, perhaps I would have continued along that route.

If I hadn’t met my junior year English teacher, the man who guided me toward writing for the school newspaper, I would have gone to med school instead of pursuing writing.

And if I hadn’t scoured the Internet for writing internships instead of accepting a public relations position that I knew deep down wasn’t right for me, I wouldn’t have a full-time position doing what I love.

I now look back on those days in keyboarding class and realize that my love for typing was an extension of my true, deep love for writing. It has guided me to where I am now: being satisfied with my work instead of working for satisfaction.

That little strange passion, that little gut feeling, was just my soul’s way of guiding me toward my true purpose. If I’ve learned anything over the years, it’s to start paying attention to my intuition. My gut knows what I need. 

Last year, I broke up with my partner of three years. When trying to explain to a friend, I couldn’t seem to put it into words. There was no clear reason: He was attractive, kind, funny, and an overall amazing guy.

But the way I felt around him didn’t give me that feeling anymore. I didn’t feel that spark. I didn’t feel passion.

I didn’t feel like I was supposed to continue down the path with him.

In an age where we have any information we need available at our fingertips, we’re expected to be able to be logical about our choices. We’re expected to be able to explain and document everything we do. We’re expected to justify our decisions in order to make everyone else feel comfortable.

Here’s what we forget: Sometimes wanting to do it is reason enough. Whether that means changing your career path or leaving a relationship, you don’t always need to be able to put your reasoning into a neat little box. And you don’t need to explain yourself to anyone.

Typing may seem like a ridiculous thing to love. But ignoring my love for the (seemingly) little things would have been to ignore my soul’s calling. To ignore those little uncomfortable pangs telling me which direction to go would have been to ignore my intuition. 

I don’t know what plans you made for this year. I don’t know what your intuition is telling you. But I bet it’s showing you where to go. 

Clear your mind. I want you to envision the life you want to live. I want you to picture the person you want to be. And I want you to figure out how to go after those things with everything you have.

Shut out any voices telling you “What if?” or “What will people think?” The only voice that matters is yours. Listen to it. 

This year is a clean slate. What are you waiting for? 

Sammy Nickalls is the content manager of Inspiyr.com, an online mag helping people get healthier, happier, and more successful. You can follow her on Twitter at @sammynickalls.

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Comments (8)

  1. 1iemand

    That last sentence is so beautiful. “The only voice that matters is yours”, that’s something I need to remind myself of, not every day, but twice a day or more. It’s supporting to read it hear, because sometimes I get the feeling that other people forget that. And there it is, I’m already thinking about what others could think.
    It’s been five years since I tried to kill myself. I still don’t know why I didn’t do it, why I couldn’t. I could feel myself dissapointed because I failed at trying to kill myself, but I chose not to. I keep thinking that it is great that I didn’t, it’s amazing to be alive.
    When I tell other students that I think it’s amazing that I just could be present at my examinations, regardless how it will turn out, they just look at me like I’m crazy. They don’t know…

    Reply  |  
    1. Sharon

      You chose not to end your life? Well done! I am so proud of you. That shows such strength. People who have never been in your shoes don’t understand at all. I thankfully have never had the strength to end my life, but have I wanted to? Like hell, yeah. I had lost any will to live, I had lost hope! You sound like the place you are now is much better than where you were five years ago. You didn’t give up, you kept going, kept fighting, kept struggling, and that ALONE is a great achievement. I hope you nevr take your strength for granted. I have been where you were…and I never want to go back there again. I wish you all the best, big hugs and lots of love.

      Reply  |  
  2. Laura

    I was meant to read this article. I’ve been struggling so much with what I’m meant to be doing in my life and I always feel like I need to justify my actions and thoughts to everybody around me. This might be too hard to answer, but how do I start paying more attention to my intuition instead of other people’s opinions and my past failures?

    Reply  |  
  3. Megan

    I struggle with depression, anxiety, and cutting. I haven’t told anyone but I want help, but don’t know how to ask. the depression is killing me, I need help

    Reply  |  
    1. Claire Biggs

      Hi Megan,

      Thank you so much for reaching out. We’re sorry to hear that you are struggling right now, but we’re so encouraged that you have reached out and vocalized that you want to find help.

      Have you thought about reaching out to a trusted family member, friend, or person in your life to let them know you are struggling? Reaching out can be scary, but we believe there are people in your life who will be able to walk through this with you while you get the help you deserve.

      It’s normal that you are unsure of what to say, but it might help to start by telling the person what you are feeling and how they can support you in finding help.

      If you haven’t, we would like to encourage you to visit our Find Help page here: https://twloha.com/find-help.

      Megan, we believe in you and are so impressed by your willingness to get the help you need. If you have any other questions, please know we answer every email we receive at [email protected].

      With Hope,

      Reply  |  
  4. jesse-walters.com

    I love this article, and can relate to it on a personal level. I recently left my job and am taking a huge risk to follow my passion in help others. In order to do that I had to make myself very vulnerable by displaying my personal struggles. For months I would ask the questions you mention in this article, “What if?” and “What will people think?” It drove me insane. I was scared. Then one day I decided enough was enough and took that leap of faith. I felt a calling despite what society might think. However, now 6 weeks into it, I don’t regret it at all. Expressing myself and becoming vulnerable has led to deeper relationships with others, and bringing true joy to my life.

    Follow your passion!

    Reply  |  
  5. Michael Ryan

    Please add me to your blog or email subscription.

    Reply  |  
    1. Claire Biggs

      Hi Michael,

      Thanks for your interest in signing up for our emails! To receive emails from us, please go here and type in your email address in the space at the bottom of the page: https://twloha.com/get-involved/.


      Reply  |  
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