And so we hope to be surprised.

By Jamie Tworkowski

This phrase has been bouncing around in me lately. It’s the idea that hope means believing things will change. And while change is often gradual and a process, it seems to also come in moments. My life has changed in moments. And the best moments have mostly been surprises – things i didn’t plan, could not have predicted or built on my own. As someone who struggles with depression, it feels important to remember the good, to fight to focus there. Perhaps having hope means hoping to be surprised. And our hope for other people is that they will stay alive to be surprised. By a love. By a friendship. By a place. By an opportunity. By so many different things. 

i was on the couch a few nights ago, feeling sorry for myself, at the end of the worst day in a while. And then an email came in, one i was not expecting. It completely changed my day and made me smile. i think it’s important to remember those things happen in this life, those bright moments.

And so we hope to be surprised. 

Our newest design comes from Melody Hansen, a very gifted artist from Toronto. 
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    Hope is fundamental to all of us …… too often, in those dark moments it is easier to draw inward than to reach out…… It is within each one of us to extend a hand and share that bright, healing light of hope with one another…… it glimmers within all of us, but too often it can become lost in the tangle of sadness and despondency. We TRUELY are one another’s keeper….. we can not exist with out extending our hands out to each other….. because so many times that is where the healing lay.

    Reply  |  
  2. b.e. noll

    Glad you were surprised by hope. I hope it continues to surprise you.

    surprised by hope
    [hoping to be surprised]

    we are just hangin’ on
    by the thinnest
    of threads
    it looks
    for all the world
    like this
    is all there is
    looks like a joke
    a fuzzy word
    in the distance
    come back
    won’t you?”
    need you
    you know
    then I turn my back
    thinking it’s over
    roll credits
    it happens
    sneaks up on me
    taps me on the shoulder
    and whispers in my ear
    “don’t give up
    there is so much for you here
    don’t throw it away
    I know it’s dark
    don’t leave
    the first rays
    of a new dawn
    all of a sudden
    a little thing
    from someone else
    brings hope
    into focus
    we still have hope
    the stars
    have not
    burned out
    just yet
    and think
    small thing you do
    could be someone else’s
    of hope
    stay long enough
    to create it

    Reply  |  
    1. mae527

      Thanks for sharing this poem, it’s really inspiring!

      Reply  |  
    2. McBride

      Thank you for sharing this. As the step-mom of a conduct-disordered pre-teen with Bi-Polar tendencies, there are days where I could walk away, give up hope, and live my own quiet life. This poem speaks what I want to say to all of the people that ask me “Why do you stay, why do you deal with someone else’s kid”. It is that spark of hope that someday he will have a good day, that there will be a light in his eyes. Thank you for putting my struggle and his father’s struggle into words.

      Reply  |  
  3. Addison

    I don’t ever think having the worst day ever is a valid phrase. The fact you feel is a bad day makes bad. I guess it doesn’t mean much coming from a teenager but I have depression which isn’t 100% gone yet. But the fact that the email- a single positive thing made it worth while is how everyone should think. Thank you for sharing it means more than anyone would think

    Reply  |  
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